I was listening to a friend the other day as she lamented what she saw as a character flaw of hers. The nature of that flaw is not important for this venue, but suffice it to say it really did upset her, so much so that she finally said “oh my God, I’m so fucked up!”
I could relate. There have been countless times, in the past, when I’ve said basically those same words, and truly felt the angst associated with those words down to the depths of my soul.
The other day, though, I just listened until she was finally on empty, and then I gave her the message I think is important for all of us to internalize: we are all fucked up!
Show me a person without issues and I’ll show you a person I have no desire to know.
An old mentor of mine said it best: we are spiritual beings having a human experience. In other words, we are imperfect on the best of days, and always will be while we rent this particular piece of cosmic real estate.
I try to remember that when I’m creating characters for a novel. We are all imperfect and we all have issues.
I actually find great comfort in embracing my imperfections. In my humble opinion, perfection is greatly overrated. Imperfection is where it is at for this boy.
It is also the reason why I don’t give advice unless it is asked for. Who am I to give advice, particularly on life’s issues? I’m a recovering alcoholic, for God’s sake. I’ve been divorced. I have made more mistakes than Carter has liver pills. Old joke! And I should tell someone else how to live?
Not likely!
More naps these days
So I’m all about love, and one reason for it is purely selfish: I need as much love as I can get, and it’s my hope that by giving love I will, in turn, receive it.
Just sayin’
Have a great day no matter your “issues.”
Bill
“Helping writers to spread their wings and fly.”
Billybuc
Artistry With Words 
What a great reminder, Bill as I agree we are all a bit “Fucked Up”! Myself included!! I have my good days and then others where I am ever so aware of this. But still glad to know I am most certainly not alone and at least in good company. Wishing you a great Tuesday ahead now 🙂
You are never alone in that respect, Janine. You’ll always have me as a kindred spirit. 🙂 Happy Tuesday to you and thank you always.
Bill
As they say in Yorkshire, “there’s nowt so strange as folk, ‘cept me and thee!”
Another way of saying what you said.
I like that, Lawrence. I like that a lot!
You tell it as it is Bro. N B.S, as they say. Bo Lozoff said that we are all doing time. A gentler way of putting it, I suppose. We are all wayfarers or sojourners heading home. Thanks Bro.
Heading home for sure, Manatita. Some of us are closer than others.
Big Bro – and you know, it’s your journey and the things you do and the way you say them that’s inspiring. 🙂 I’m grateful to know you and I’m grateful our paths have crossed.
On this mindful journey I’ve been on, I have learned to be much kinder to myself. I used to say stuff like that all the time: Oh I’m too this or I’m too that.
It’s funny how life takes a nice turn for the better when you start loving on yourself and trying to say only loving things. I’m not always good at doing that – I do have my low/bad days – but for the most part, I’m learning to use the tool of self-love. By golly I love it, lol.
Well there’s that and I’m a recovering perfectionist. Actually, I realized probably 10 years ago that perfectionism is a hindrance. If something’s good enough, then move on. If it’s not, well, try to do well so you don’t have to do it a second time. And try my best at everything. But sometimes I just get so tired that all this wisdom goes out the window and I think, “dang…I’m just going to bed and hitting my restart button.” lol
Thank you Lil Sis…kinder to oneself….man, that’s a tough one, isn’t it? But if we want to experience growth, it is necessary, my friend. Thank you for sharing that…hugs coming atcha!
Indeed, it will come back to you in return. You have experienced it in gardening my friend: That what we are sowing sooner or later we are harvesting. Perfectly! (When “I” know what I do and I do the best I know – it’s my perfect.)
Michael my friend, perfectly stated. Thank you and peace be with you always.
Bill, I totally agree that perfectionism is overrated, and yet I can’t let it go. It’s so much a part of who I am. However, I have learned to temper it. I let it guide me to do the best work I can, but I don’t stress if I make a tiny mistake. If I can fix it quickly, I do. If it’s more bother than what it’s worth, I don’t. 99.9% of the time, it doesn’t detract from the overall effect.
And yes, every one of us is f***ed up in one way or another. Some hide it better than others, but it’s there. ‘Spiritual beings having a human experience,’ I like that. Must keep this in mind and remember that mistakes are all part of the learning experience.
Have a lovely day, Bill.
Thank you Zulma! 99.9% of the time ain’t a bad percentage at all. I would call that growth for a former perfectionist. 🙂
Oh yeah… Preach it brother.
I’m probably the most fucked up of all.
But we still move forward.
Now you are being competitive, Greg! LOL most fucked up of all…I take issue with that…I’m the most fucked up! LOL
Maybe it’s just me but being the most f***ed up is not a title worth vying for. lol
“Perfection, I know nothing about. I never claim ‘knowledge’ let alone superior knowledge. It works out better for me that way. I’d like to say I manage one language, but for the amount of misunderstanding that goes on between the words leaving my mouth meaning one thing and reaching someone’s ears and meaning something completely different, well it happens all the time. Perhaps it is the air the words pass through that is the issue.” mckbirdbks (My Hubpage profile blurb.)
Some people discover this truth, as you have pointed out here.
I think it must be the air, Mike. It can’t possibly be your usage of words, which is exemplary. 🙂 Thanks my friend.